INBETWEENERS

I watch a lot of cartoons. The crappier they are, the more I like them. One of the things I most look out for are the transitional drawings that appear for a split second before something or someone else is superimposed upon them, or for a moment just after something happens: the landscapes and interiors and backdrops to the action. Some are pleasingly abstract, others almost surreal. They are art without a subject, a void waiting to be filled - usually with inanity. For what it's worth, these come from the 1970/71 Hanna-Barbera series, Josie and the Pussycats.

BROKEN MINDS BRING BAD LUCK

Suspiria, d. Dario Argento (1977)

A ghost train of a film. It also looks gorgeous, even when it’s showing us extremely ugly things. The plot can be summarised in one short line ('young woman discovers witches'), but the pleasure of the film is in its atmosphere and its design and it’s full on, balls out, bonkers bombast, a surreal nightmare in Technicolor with a deafening soundtrack. It’s the sort of film where a young woman frantically crawls through a tiny window to escape a killer, only to fall into a room full of razor wire. It’s a wonder, and a hell of a ride.     

INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES OF THE DAY

A small selection of some of the many lovely subtitles from the bizarre Convent Of The Holy Beast. 

SCHOOL FOR SCOUNDRELS

Convent Of The Holy Beast, d. Noribumi Suzuki (1974)

A young woman goes Nun-derecover© at a creepy convent to find the people who murdered her mother and put her up for adoption. She uncovers the usual lesbianism, hoarding of pornography, sausage stealing, topless whippings, punishment by rose and non-stop masturbation, but also a horrible secret about her own birth and the hypocrisy of those supposedly serving God. 

I would call it sleazy and dirty, because it is, but it's not disgusting and filthy, so I can almost justify enjoying it.